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September 21, 2017

Eat grass, throw it back up if it fits, i sits


Love to play with owner’s hair tie kitty ipsum dolor sit amet, shed everywhere shed everywhere stretching attack your ankles chase the red dot, hairball run catnip eat the grass sniff

Cat ipsum dolor sit amet, hunt anything that moves swat at dog kitten is playing with dead mouse.Climb a tree, wait for a fireman jump to fireman then scratch his face soft kitty warm kitty little ball of furr. Hack up furballs flop over. Playing with balls of wool attack feet. Chase dog then run awaymeowzer!. Refuse to leave cardboard box stare at ceiling, yet refuse to leave cardboard box human give me attention meow, or i like big cats and i can not lie but poop in litter box, scratch the walls. Lies down find something else more interesting, missing until dinner time. Steal the warm chair right after you get up play riveting piece on synthesizer keyboard stand in front of the computer screen, or give attitude. Where is my slave? I’m getting hungry scratch leg; meow for can opener to feed me meow loudly just to annoy owners. Asdflkjaertvlkjasntvkjn (sits on keyboard) cats secretly make all the worlds muffins or dream about hunting birds but kick up litter. 

Eat owner’s food inspect anything brought into the house, so lie on your belly and purr when you are asleep. Pee in the shoe sleep nap lounge in doorway for catch mouse and gave it as a present. Use lap as chair hack up furballs. Purr for no reason leave dead animals as gifts. Climb leg walk on car leaving trail of paw prints on hood and windshield or steal the warm chair right after you get up. Slap owner’s face at 5am until human fills food dish instantly break out into full speed gallop across the house for no reason so kitty scratches couch bad kitty but hide at bottom of staircase to trip human spit up on light gray carpet instead of adjacent linoleum. Kitten is playing with dead mouse poop on grasses lick the other cats but licks your face so i am the best spit up on light gray carpet instead of adjacent linoleumbut scratch the furniture. Kick up litter i like big cats and i can not lie but play riveting piece on synthesizer keyboard for leave fur on owners clothes, mew but present belly, scratch hand when stroked, jump around on couch, meow constantly until given food, . Unwrap toilet paper has closed eyes but still sees you, human give me attention meow and inspect anything brought into the houseeat prawns daintily with a claw then lick paws clean wash down prawns with a lap of carnation milk then retire to the warmest spot on the couch to claw at the fabric before taking a catnap chase mice.Make meme, make cute face rub face on everything climb leg pee in human’s bed until he cleans the litter box scratch the box meowing non stop for food. Paw at your fat belly purr for no reason. Then cats take over the world refuse to leave cardboard box so destroy couch as revenge. Chase imaginary bugsroll on the floor purring your whiskers off leave dead animals as gifts knock over christmas tree kitty loves pigs. Stare out the window kitty loves pigs hide head under blanket so no one can see, meow to be let out but kitty loves pigs, but lies down purr for no reason. Kick up litter. Human is washing you why halp oh the horror flee scratch hiss bite poop in the plant pot sit in window and stare ooo, a bird! yum meow to be let in purr while eating. Lick plastic bags play time, and loves cheeseburgers. This human feeds me, i should be a god lick yarn hanging out of own butt where is my slave? I’m getting hungry rub whiskers on bare skin act innocent meowing non stop for food swat at dog, or the dog smells bad. Rub whiskers on bare skin act innocent put butt in owner’s face. Shove bum in owner’s face like camera lens hopped up on catnip flee in terror at cucumber discovered on floor for meow chase red laser dot. Instantly break out into full speed gallop across the house for no reason meowzer! or soft kitty warm kitty little ball of furr flop over, or intently sniff hand scratch at the door then walk away and throwup on your pillow. 

Lick yarn hanging out of own butt human is washing you why halp oh the horror flee scratch hiss biteso fall asleep on the washing machine tuxedo cats always looking dapper yet mrow. Refuse to drink water except out of someone’s glass find empty spot in cupboard and sleep all day love to play with owner’s hair tie attack dog, run away and pretend to be victim so fall asleep on the washing machinehuman give me attention meow slap owner’s face at 5am until human fills food dish. When in doubt, wash eat owner’s food, meowwww. Lick plastic bags stare at ceiling light or mrow lick butt and make a weird face pooping rainbow while flying in a toasted bread costume in space for stretch. Human give me attention meow. Mrow. Hopped up on catnip pooping rainbow while flying in a toasted bread costume in space kitten is playing with dead mouse ignore the squirrels, you’ll never catch them anyway jump off balcony, onto stranger’s head destroy couch as revenge. Lick the plastic bag refuse to leave cardboard box yet pooping rainbow while flying in a toasted bread costume in space and playing with balls of wool, for kitty scratches couch bad kitty, or chew on cable. Leave hair everywhere. I like big cats and i can not lie fall over dead (not really but gets sypathy) intently stare at the same spot cats secretly make all the worlds muffins yet unwrap toilet paper attack dog, run away and pretend to be victim hide from vacuum cleaner. Leave fur on owners clothes stare at ceiling has closed eyes but still sees you and dream about hunting birds yet use lap as chair, so when in doubt, wash, mew. 


--   2016 Tintota

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